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Post by Chester on Mar 22, 2015 0:01:35 GMT
Chester couldn't breath, tears rolling down her face, and mind whizzing at a thousand miles per hour. Akvan, Akvan was alive, was there the entire fucking time and never told her... She was beginning to trust Flood, and where did that leave her? Broken. She was running through the forests of Rycora, a place she hadn't properly visited in almost seventeen years... Death disease following her, killing everything. So it was the safest place to be right now, so she didn't kill anyone else. Why would Akvan do that? Why lie? She eventually stopped, tripping over an overgrown root. She didn't care, in fact, Chester buried herself as close to the tree as she could, tucking her knees to her chest and burying her face in them, letting her tears fall. She knew Gensho probably came after her, and she should have probably stayed behind to console him, knowing he was probably in just a bad a state... But she just couldn't bring herself to. This was the weakest she had been in the past seventeen years... The most broken, and she didn't want anyone to see her this way. Making sure no passers by, if there happened to be some, could easily spot the distressed Demon, Chester allowed herself to let lose all emotions she had bottled up for the past decade and a half... Killing the majority of the life around her in the process.
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Post by Flood/Akvan on Mar 22, 2015 0:41:00 GMT
Moving without the help of Eteru was incredibly slow, and right now, Akvan didn't need this slow tempo'd run. Without wings or Light shadow magic, he couldn't go far without tiring. But what he was following wasn't something Akvan could lose track of easily. The invisible trail of Disease magic was irreplaceable, and could only belong to one person. Akvan was trained personally in the art of locating it, having bared the power so long ago, and his special vision was still working where Eteru was not. So the magic literally created a path to follow. Fortunately, although in the worst of contexts, Gensho and Chester had separated off from one another. Akvan didn't know if he could face both at once, knowing even meeting one would break him enough. But he promised to try, even though he felt like he'd know the results beforehand. Things got hotter the deeper Akvan went into Rycora, feeling the magic around him like an overwhelming fog. Sun children couldn't get sick, since they healed at such a fast rate, their immune system was all but impossible to beat. Which boded well, for who Akvan desperately wanted to find here. He slowly stopped running, looking around the forest some more as he walked. Of all the places, why here? Akvan knew why Chester had come here, for the tragically smart reason that whilst here, she couldn't hurt anyone with Disease magic. But this place, all of Rycora forest only reminded Akvan of when they'd met. He was half expecting her to be stuck in spider web again, to create a light in the dark Akvan's heart so easily again. But this time, things were horribly different, Akvan knew he'd come out of this being changed, though he knew it probably wouldn't be a good change. Taking deep, quiet breaths, Akvan reached what his eyes could see was the strongest part of the magic. But, he didn't see the owner. Akvan took a few circles around, bumping hard into the side of a tree as he forgot how solid his body was right now, not like the misty Eteru form. Another change he'd have to get used to, whilst the magic he'd relied on so heavily before was now missing. Akvan took a few more looks around, hearing something broken, that in turn broke Akvan. Those were tears, Akvan knew them well, but never wanted to hear that person give them. He took his hat off, wondering if perhaps she was above instead. But no, Chester wasn't anywhere. Akvan's eyes dropped, if she was hiding, and obviously had a good reason to, then she was good at it. Better than Akvan was at finding her anyway. He wondered if he should just leave now, if those cries meant anything, they were a warning to the liar. Sighing, the Sun child gave up relying on normal vision, praying his soul vision would still work at finding Chester. Closing his eyes, Akvan stood in the open, hoping to sense Chester somewhere around here, and not be destroyed by the state of her probably damaged soul right now.
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Post by Chester on Mar 22, 2015 21:05:35 GMT
For what it was worth, Chester knew someone was around. But she refused to show where she was, knowing it was probably the last person she wished to talk to right now, even if she knew she would eventually have to face everything again... No matter how much she resisted. She wanted to run from it all... Didn't want to face her past at such magnifying lengths, she has only just come to terms with it all, and now she was back at the bottom, a place she thought she finally managed to escape from. Part of her wished Exitium did kill her during the battle, at least then she wouldn't feel pain and anguish anymore... At least she wouldn't have to put up a brave façade when around anyone else. She could still sense the other around, his aura familiar, and it was that moment she realised that, yes, it was Akvan who followed her here, and yes, she probably wouldn't be able to run from this even though she wanted to. Deciding that it was time to put things behind her and get the inevitable over and done with. Chester wiped away the tears on her face, a lost cause really, and stood up, walking a little more into the open before putting on a brave face. "You have a lot of nerve following me asshole... One slap not enough for you?" Chester wasn't going to play kind, and if he got too close, then she was quite willing to hurt him. |
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Post by Flood/Akvan on Mar 22, 2015 22:02:34 GMT
Akvan didn't want to make it seem like he was stalking right now, but he did feel like he was hunting Chester down. And what for? Damage was done, and Akvan didn't have anything planned to try and make into an excuse for abandoning her for so long. So maybe he was just here to see her again, and if that meant letting her beat him up in the process, then so be it. It was just as Akvan's vision was being honed down that Chester spoke, making the skittish Akvan jump. He turned quickly, though wished he'd changed his soul vision off as he did. The coloured mess of Chester's soul hit Akvan hard with pain, striking his literally heartless chest like an arrow. There was a build up of everything in her, and all of it was negative, anger and hate. Taking one long blink to change visions, Akvan looked up again, trying to pull himself together and refuse to let himself break down again. Swallowing down hard, Akvan messed with the end of his hat. "I-i-it was... so was Gensho's slap... a-and Rurushu's punch... b-but that's not important." As far as things they could do to the regenerative being, slapping and beating him up wasn't the worst. Even though he'd been attacked not long ago, the burning red sensation on Akvan's face had already disappeared, as had the sore stomach and broken nose. "What's... w-what's important is t-telling you how sorry I.. I am. That I... stayed d-dead so that you... a-and Gensho w-w-would be safe."
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Post by Chester on Mar 22, 2015 22:15:44 GMT
Chester just stared at Akvan, glad that she wasn't the only one who snapped, and she made a mental note to thank Ru later, for what reason she wasn't sure, maybe it was just because he cared enough to punch the other... Knowing him it was probably more as well. But it was what was said next that stopped the tears altogether, and made Chester freeze for a moment before she cracked and let out a manic laugh. "Sorry? Your sorry... Of course you bloody are... Poor little Chester breaks and all you can say is sorry... Well sorry isn't going to cut it im afraid, but I guess you already knew that..." Chester shook her head and moved hair from her face... Something snapped... Many times she imagined Akvan returning, somewhere deep inside her finding a way for it to happen... But none of those fantasies lived up to this... Oh no, she's broken, and mad, but loving every second of it... She hasn't felt so alive in so long. "Nobody is safe in this world... Not while Exitium rules.... Keeping us safe was a lost cause from the very beginning. Ha-ha." Chester just couldn't stop laughing... "What's with the stuttering Akvan... Cant even apologise without making it seem as if your lying? Hehe."
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Post by Flood/Akvan on Mar 22, 2015 23:16:23 GMT
Akvan didn't know what he'd expected. Laughter wasn't even close to anything Akvan might have considered as a response to his pathetic beg for forgiveness. This wasn't a good laughter, it was the kind that sent a chill down Akvan's back. Though behind that manic outburst, Chester had a point. Sorry was all Akvan could think of to say. He wasn't good at talking, even as Flood he'd experienced that. So Akvan never knew what to say, and thinking of what to say when the situation was this severe, Akvan was left with very little vocabulary to choose from. So he could only nodded carefully to answer Chester's first point, looking down to the floor. Akvan was terrified right now, more so than he'd been even when facing Chester before when hiding behind Flood's disguise. Keeping them safe. That was how Akvan had put it, and to an extent he'd been right. Though up until Chester was kidnapped just to get to Flood, Akvan had been avoiding them to keep them safe. Giving in to his own desire to see Chester again, and falsely believing that perhaps being around the Mun clan might help her, Akvan had broken his vow never to be near them again. Akvan's eyes remained down, almost as if he feared lifting them, "B... b-but I s-still... thought I c-could... keep you all s-safe." Akvan replied weakly. Chester's comment on his shaky voice didn't help it improve, and it in fact got worst. At last Akvan was speaking without a lie coming immediately from his mouth. But after everything, Akvan sounded more guilty than ever when he spoke in a stuttered voice. "A-at least... safer than b-before." Rurushu could have gone on forever before that the Pandemic wasn't all Akvan's fault. But the Sun child had been given seventeen years to convince himself that it was. And right now, Akvan still saw himself to blame. For Chester almost dying, for Gensho to be infected as a Kyuban, for everything. "I... I-I'm not l-lying." He added softly, which sounded next to completely unconvincing, and yet for Akvan he knew it was truthful.
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Post by Chester on Mar 27, 2015 21:40:16 GMT
Chester just shook her head and finished her laughing fit before taking a breath and getting serious... Because she was far from amused, and Akvan deserved to know that. "WHAT THE HELL DID I SAY ABOUT THE STUTTERING?" Rolling her eyes, Chester looked to the sky and hugged herself... Wanted to keep them safe, huh? Thought he could? In this world, it was impossible, one wrong move and your on the hit list... Chester was almost on that anyways, and joining the clan was the thing to finish the contract... And who's fault was it she joined? "It was my choice during the Pandemic and before hand on how safe I was... I could have done things differently, could have been protected... But I decided not for that. This time round... Oh this time round you put me in the line of danger, joining the clan under your request, that's what made Exitium sign the contract for my head... But I don't see a reason why I should be telling you this..." Chester knew he was telling the truth... There was no need to hide it anymore... But that didn't mean she wanted to believe him, because if he was being honest about being sorry, then this wouldn't have happened in the first place. "Your not really... Because being sorry, means you made a mistake, and im sure you don't see what you did as a mistake... So tell me Akvan, why'd ya do it? Why hide and lie... Why follow me for fourteen years and not mention it.... What made you fucking believe your death was better for us?"
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Post by Flood/Akvan on Mar 27, 2015 22:15:46 GMT
Akvan's way of talking was never a strong point. The confidence of Flood having no identity, meant Akvan had been so much braver in everything. As Akvan, he could only ever debate whether to run, or to stand and shake to his core. Stuttering was something Akvan always did, from even the slightest bit of shyness. The more shy and scared he was, the worse his speak was. Maybe Chester knew this, because all she did was make it worse still. She brought up another good point. It was because of Akvan alone that Chester was put in harms way, at a crucial time when Akvan should be avoiding her completely. He took a deep breath, shaky as he felt himself fall deeper down into this terror. Akvan knew he'd be haunted by those simple words forever. Why? Why did he betray the trust of his friends and loved ones? Akvan knew why, but he didn't know if he dared to tell anyone else. The truth, the honest to the Sun truth about everything, included a lot of things that to this day, Akvan hadn't told anyone else before. "B-because... I was... s-scared." He answered. "S-scared of... b-being the one t-t-to get you hurt again. A-as Akvan... I b-brought nothing g-good. I thought... maybe... Flood could d-do something g-good."
He swallowed, still unable to look up, and doubted he would at all during this meeting. "B-b-but I did make a mistake... w-w-when I saw m-more of what your life was... I-it reminded me of h-his- of my life.... I thought t-that... m-maybe Flood could do g-good, and help you... l-like you helped me." Akvan had been desperate to do so many years beforehand when watching Chester's life, but fear overtook a lot of things Akvan had wanted to do. Fear and confusion.
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Post by Chester on Mar 27, 2015 22:30:31 GMT
Chester clenched her hands together as he stuttered more, it just reminding her of everything. Before she felt tears well up in her eyes again... She was mad, oh so terribly mad at Akvan for everything. But sadness overwhelmed that considerable now that she got talking to him... Akvan had no fucking idea, absolutely none. How could he think that by being someone else, he would be able to help her. "As Akvan you gave me everything... Helped me to be who I wanted to be, not the person who lived to make her 'family' happy... Not someone who lived as a mindless zombie, being manipulated by those who 'helped' her... Because that was my life before you..." Wiping away tears, Chester weakly glared at Akvan. "I cared not for 'Flood', I may have began to trust him, but I didn't care for him... He did nothing to help me but make me become less blinded to things... But he didn't nearly do as much as Akvan did..." Chester could feel the events taking a strain on her body, and she gave up trying to seem strong... Because after everything, she just wasn't... She felt oh so weak and tired of everything. "I was more hurt over losing you, then I ever way by another hands alone... Those pains and wounds healed and were forgotten, could be forgotten... But the pain, and hurt I felt, when Mo returned and told me and your brother, told Gensho, that you were dead... I felt myself break..."
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Post by Flood/Akvan on Mar 27, 2015 23:15:13 GMT
Akvan's teeth gritted together. Oh how words like that would have made Akvan feel better before. Thinking that perhaps he'd made a difference on people's lives before. Chester's past, before Akvan even knew her, he honestly didn't really understand. Her relation to the Outlaws, or anything, was as clear as his original past was, back when Akvan was being used as a wall. It was all blank in Akvan's mind, along with a lot of things. The desperation to tell Chester what really happened, and everything before and after that time in the cave, was strong. But once more, like always, Akvan was pulled back. It was a while before Akvan spoke, because he needed to think through what he said, so that he could try and do something for Chester. "Akvan... didn't deserve to be that person. He... I, never helped anyone. I'm not the one who deserved to help you... maybe I'm never going to be." And saying that made Akvan himself tear up. What if someone else had found Chester stuck in the woods that day? Would they have been able to help her better than Akvan? Maybe someone else would have been able to listen, and be more confident than Akvan had been. Maybe they would have seen Chester's troubles, and help fix them before they got worse. Maybe they would have been able to hold onto life for that bit longer, if not for themselves, then for her. But Akvan didn't feel like he was any of that, and that he wasn't the one Chester deserved. Akvan's head shook slowly, "How could I have made a difference, when I was too blind to even see, what was wrong?" What life Chester must have had before Akvan, growing up amongst the likes of Itami and her outlaws. If Akvan could have just seen that... "I don't even know... what life was like for you, b-before I appeared."
His eyes squeezed shut, thinking about what kind of emotional experience it would have been, having the hope of Akvan returning after the Pandemic crushed as the coward took the easy way out instead. "Mo tried so hard... to make me better again. You all did... but it was never that easy... I just wish... I could tell you why..." Akvan placed a hand over where his heart would have been. And where he'd pierced himself to die once. "Why I did... that."
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Post by Chester on Mar 27, 2015 23:49:20 GMT
Chester let Akvan have a few moments before speaking, too tired of everything to argue any longer, instead taking the time to calm down and stop crying... She waited so long for him to return, and even if she would never forgive him for this, ever let him back in like before... She would at least be civil now, if only for the last time, if only for their conjoining past memories. "You helped me more then you realise.... But your also the one to knock me back down again..." Chester wasn't going to sugar coat anything... This was his punishment, that he would hear nothing but the truth before they went their separate ways. Sighing slightly, Chester knew she would have to explain, but where to begin. Sending a look to Akvan, Chester took a breath before sitting down. "Make yourself comfortable... Its a long story..." Waiting until he did so, Chester leant her head back against the wall and closed her eyes. "At that time, things were different... Ru really was part of the Outlaws, happily a part of them, having helped to create the rebellion with... Her. And when I was just four, he killed my parents as they attempted to get in the way... Later on he apologise profoundly, but that's not that point. He found me hiding, took me to the Outlaws hideout... It was a small group back then. He convinced them to take me in like family... Itami at first apparently refused, but she had plans, plans that she managed to fit me into... And that's where it began. They made me grow up training to fight, taught me that the Angels were bad, as were Humans.. The works. When I turned thirteen, things fully changed... They forced me to become an Angel hunter... My life before hand was okay, I was treated like family, but I was happy... Anyways... I didn't want to become one, having made my own views on things... But I wanted to make them proud, pay them back for all they had done for me, I wanted to protect the only ones I ever really knew. I fell easy into the role, seemingly becoming a cold hearted killer, even though I felt guilty for every kill made... Having used my age as an excuse to get close to them... A year later, everything went down hill... It was the first time I was invited to a meeting, I found out the plans, and my role in them... But again, they did so much for me, and I felt as if I owed them.... Ru was different though, he actually seemed to care, and during those years we formed a proper brotherly sisterly relation. As for the bitch, well, it was the beginning of the end, I made an enemy out of her, and we would often get into... Tiffs. It was then I changed, only killed when need be, even when I did my job well... Itami hated it, hated me, and would find any excuse for punishment..." Taking a breath, Chester wiped away tears before continuing... For her to explain everything, she needed to go into detail on how much things changed when she met him... "And soon after, I got stuck in these woods and met someone... Someone I knew about, an important part of the plans I had been apart of... He managed to break me away from my mindless, numbing life... I didn't want to befriend them at first, knowing their fate... But I fell, and I fell hard... I felt more alive, more myself, then I had ever done in my life as a 'slave' to the Outlaws... He taught me, in his own way, on how important things were... Friends, family that were actually caring... He made me look at life in a different way... I met others through that, opened up more... And I found who I was... I wanted to be the good guy... I wanted to help, but my drive to make those who had cared for me for so many years proud was more important... Until it was too late.... You know the rest..."
Chester gave Akvan time to let it all sink in, before stretching out and drying up her tears. Now he knew... But it felt like a weight off her chest. But they weren't done here... Chester managed to pry information from Mo about what happened to Akvan that day, and though she didn't get all the information, she got enough to know what happened. "Honestly, im kind of amazed at what you did... The sacrifice... Mo told me enough... What I want to know, Is why? Because I know the old demon is hiding far too much... And I wanna know what... And we tried hard because we cared, didn't you see that? Realise that?" Chester felt tears pouring down her face once more, and just left them this time... She was certain more would come. |
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Post by Flood/Akvan on Mar 28, 2015 20:10:49 GMT
Akvan complied with Chester's suggestion, falling back to sit against a tree as she went to explain things. He felt like he should be grateful for her to open up like this, especially to someone he could tell she despised right now. But he also felt bad, bad that it had taken this long to hear Chester's story, a history that Akvan should have heard long ago. Akvan didn't interrupt, or even show any response at all during Chester's story, only occasionally dropping his gaze down. So Chester wasn't just a part of the Outlaws, she'd basically been born into them, being taught to know no better than how to fight. A Human girl, raised to be a Demon. Akvan could only imagine how Mo must have felt about this, how anyone of kind mind would think about this. Hearing that Chester was a killer didn't affect Akvan like it would have done before. Death was his best friend now, and he'd killed himself, knowing where those who'd died got to go. So that wasn't what made Chester's story hit Akvan hard, it was the idea that all her Human life she'd been led to believe in those who'd kidnapped her. She was a slave made to feel like family, and it was sickening.
His eyes lifted to the last section of this story. So even before meeting, Chester knew who Akvan was, and what plans were made for him. She was made well aware of the Outlaws plans, how Akvan's fate was to be chosen... how everything was supposed to happen. And yet she still wanted to meet him, befriend him. Teach him what love felt like, all knowing it would be taken away? Akvan didn't know what to make of that. He didn't feel mad or betrayed, like he'd ever done, even when Chester was revealed as a traitor back before the Pandemic. But he felt less and less... good, knowing all of this. Akvan tried smiling, but it was only drawn away when he had to reply. "I always thought... t-that I was the one... b-being changed." He muttered, knees tucked up to his chest. "B-but maybe I was... m-making life better. B-but what did I do... with that life?" He asked himself. It wasn't really a case of throwing his own life away, but giving in to the belief that it really was a pointless existence.
He placed a hand over his chest again, only wishing his body could have the scar of what he'd once taken so willingly. He hadn't wanted anyone to know how he'd died, only that they didn't need to worry anymore, they didn't need to remember this strange existence known as Akvan. Least of all Chester, but he wasn't surprised that she'd want to know more. And Akvan didn't know how much he could tell, without telling her the things that haunted Akvan about himself. But she'd be honest, ever so honest, when explaining her past. Would that make Akvan brave enough to open up about his own?
"... He n-never want to t-tell even me, Mo didn't. W-when I asked why, why someone... something like me existed, h-he didn't want to say." Akvan began, swallowing down a minority of his fear for this. "I'm m-meant for nothing... but death and d-destruction... I knew that, before it was even confirmed t-to me. Everything I told you... a-as Flood, is true. I t-threw my chance of h-happiness away... b-because I didn't think I-I was w-worth... a-any of it. I d-didn't think... I d-deserved your care."
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Post by Chester on Mar 29, 2015 20:45:04 GMT
Chester was grateful that he remained quiet through out the explanation, it was hard enough explaining without the questions, and it brought up too many unwanted memories... But she knew it had to be done, even if it was just to finally close up a chapter in her life. But it was harder to explain what he did to help... When its not something that can easily be explained... But she knew she would have to. "What you did? Its difficult to explain, but I shall try my best... For me, you helped me realise what family really was, and regardless of the 'care' I felt for my 'family', I realised that they weren't... But those I chose was, Ru, Kaku, Nanari, Gensho, Onrah... You. You made me realise that there were two different kinds of care... You helped me to break from a bubble I didn't know I was in... Made me realise what love was... Because I loved you Akvan... And that's why I broke away from the Outlaws and tried to help Onrah that day, because I realised I loved you, and that they were my family..." Wiping away tears, Chester gave a weak smile. "I know I should have said something back then... I regret not doing so for so long, but I couldn't yano? The outlaws had been there for me, and at the time, I felt as if I owed them that much... But I never expected to meet you either, and you turned my world upside down for the better.... Well before you did this stunt."
With this Chester looked to Akvan, looked at him properly or probably the first time since finding out the truth... She waned to know the truth, the exact reason behind his choices now and back then, and only he could give them. She knew Mo didn't want to say... She guessed as it was something taboo, something he regretted... She could tell the signs, she just didn't know what. But she felt anger well up inside as Akvan spoke... He really was an complete idiot in the worst of ways. Standing up, Chester took a breath before looking down to him. "If you weren't worth it... Why did I throw everything away to help not just them but you... Lie to my family about knowing you... Why did Onrah and Gensho try so hard to help you if you weren't worth it? Why did Mo try and come to save you if you weren't worth it? Huh? You say your meant for nothing but destruction... Well, sorry to say but im one hundred per cent sure Exitium has that covered... Your meant for whatever the fuck you want to be meant for... You follow your own life plans, don't let another decide for you... Because I've been there... And look where that got me.... Once loving someone who was willing to throw it all away for stupid self loathing reasons... We cared Akvan... Why you decided to push that away believing you don't deserve it don't know... Because we have never been ones to care for no god damned reason..." |
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Post by Flood/Akvan on Mar 29, 2015 21:32:01 GMT
Chester's story, and reason for being changed, sounded a lot like what Akvan once believed. How he'd been changed. Long ago, they could have wondered over how one had changed the other, thanked each other for it. But now, Akvan was haunted by what he believed was an absolute truth, and something he didn't have the heart to admit. Holding back his tears, Akvan released the emotional pressure in one big breath, swallowing hard afterwards. "A-akvan... would have said the same." He muttered as a reply, knowing that he didn't need to elaborate on that. Chester had heard Akvan's confession once, during the Ball, and was sure she didn't want those memories brought back up by him right now. He remained frozen, looking up to Chester as she towered above him, hounding down at the Sun child with reasons why he shouldn't believe his own words. It was warming, to think that maybe... they did all care for a reason. But then chilled Akvan to his core. Of course they would say that, not knowing the truth. Akvan was a monster in disguise, hiding his true identity even know. Before, he was able to live in naivety, considering himself a simple Demon that was born with less chaotic instinct than most. But now, Akvan knew his true reason for being so different, and it haunted every compliment or good thought Akvan had.
His lips quivered, how Akvan wanted to explain why Chester was wrong. But he feared that she would hate him for explaining his past to her, as well as hating him for not telling it. There wasn't a way to win, and winning didn't seem good either. What was Akvan trying to do? Win the argument, get Chester to understand that she'd cared for no reason? In the end, all Akvan was doing was giving up, and trying to take everyone down with him. It might look as though he was trying to make things right between Chester and himself, but was that an impossible hope?
"I-if we follow our own path... t-then I d-decided to follow the l-lonely one... where I b-belong." Akvan mumbled, sighing. "I-if I wasn't w-welcome down d-death's path... then I d-don't belong down a p-path w-where I'm worthy of f-forgiveness." Akvan stated, staring at the floor. He'd come here hoping to find hope of being forgiven. But after hearing everything, Akvan felt even more stupid for thinking he deserved such a thing. It was only natural for one to be loved, and Akvan desired that beyond anything. But he was still learning to accept the fact, the fact he'd refused to learn long ago, that Akvan didn't have the capability to love, or be loved... not truly. If Chester fell in love with the false Akvan from the past, and despised the true Akvan, where did that leave him? Akvan didn't think he knew what love was anymore, he could only try desperately to find it again, knowing he'd fail.
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Post by Chester on Mar 29, 2015 21:57:11 GMT
Chester hoped that what she said would have got through to him, even a little... But she could see now that wouldn't be the case.. It infuriated her to no end, but if this was who the true Akvan was... Then Chester wanted nothing to do with him... Because this Akvan was running from the truth, running from his mistakes to the point in which he's forgetting who he once was. The Akvan she knew is dead... And in his place is someone who she hated. Someone she could never forgive. "I can see nothing I say will change your views... I guess you don't even care enough to see it from my point of view... And considering what you have done... You should be grateful im even trying to... We cared Akvan, Gensho still cares... Me not so much anymore, I have been through too much shit to find that in myself... But I will tell you this... And you better fucking listen with you very soul because its the nicest thing that im ever going to say to you from here on out... Maybe your weren't invited down deaths path for a reason... Because the world needed your help, because people loved you enough that you were given the chance to return, to put things right... Someone like you doesn't belong down a lonely path, and im sure Gensho and Onrah would say the same... So, you are going to stop this fucking self loathing thing you still have going on, because I and everyone else is damn well sick of it... Do what you must to get yourself on that path to forgiveness from everyone else... Because you damn well ain't going to find that path through me... Why? Because I loved you Akvan, no matter who or what you were, Gensho loved you like a brother, still does... You had a chance for a new life, to start again and be happy, but you threw that away for stupid reasons. I may not love you like I once did because of that, but I damn well know that Gensho will... Fix it, if not for yourself then for him, for everyone who ever cared, and maybe, just maybe you will begin to see the god damned truth..." This was far too emotional for Chester's tastes, and probably the nicest thing she had said to anyone for a good long while... Unfortunately, it happened for the wrong reasons. Because she knew she couldn't ever forgive Akvan for this, no matter what he did.
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